Saturday, August 06, 2005
Tales from The Country™
it’s Summer—so that stink must be the Fair!
So I went to the County Fair yesterday. The thing about this fair is, if ya ever been before - you’ve been. So it’s an exercise in the familiar and checking to see what’s different ‘this year.’ And seeing the animals.
Under ‘new stuff’, there was a big display—one of those that is a semi-trailer with bump-outs—that looked like the inside of a house. For Scott paper products. On the way in they hand you a packet of the wet wipes and a bunch of coupons and as ya go thru, there are rolls of tear-off “hints” for improving your life [using Scott products, o’course.] I learned deep things like, “keep bandaids in the kitchen” and “use paper towels to wipe up spills.” uhm… ‘k. Hints for Todds.
Then—the good part: *drumroll* at the end *drumroll* they hand ya *drumroll* as a gift *drumroll* a roll of TP! *random cheering*
No bag, no cute little sack --- just one of those hotel, paper-wrapped rolls of TP. Simply everybody walking around the fair had one—which accounted for much heated speculation until we saw the display.
No neat new gadgets in the hucksters hall—disappointing. Remember when the fluffy dust wands were new? Those’re cool. Now it’s the same ol’ rubber brooms and ‘magic’ dust cloths; “As Seen on TV!” [why do they think that makes something more ...er, *real*?!?] ZZzzzzzzz
Two kewl things, tho. Aussie hats and ear cuffs. I snagged two hats—a khaki version of the black one I’ve been wearing this Spring and one especially made for my favorite trick: dunk the hat in the horse trough—yes, it’s clean - it’s drinking water ferhevinsake—shake it off and wear. Like instant air conditioning. Works great here in The West where there is no moisture in the air and the touch of the sun feels like laying your cheek on a hot, un-buttered griddle. The hat not only has the mesh bonnet [the part not the brim - just learned that term] that lets what small few breezes we get to blow thru and cool the brainpan, but the brim is specially designed to let the water dry slowly thus prolonging the air conditioning effect. Mmmm-mmmm, aaahhhhh.
And the earrings--mmmm, the earrings. Made from silver or gold wire, they fit like cuffs but have scrolly, wispy bits down, or both up and down the whole ear. Verrry giiiirly.
The funniest thing I saw was the DNC booth. Yep, every year both parties have booths in the hucksters’ hall. At the Rep. booth, there were bumperstickers like, “BIGOT: a conservative who wins an argument with a liberal” heh. Sense o’ Humor ‘r’ Republicans.
At the DNC booth? Kerry Edwards stickers. FOR SALE!
And Gore stickers! My friend and I were stopped, slack-jawed in our tracks by the K/E sticker, the LOL* at the booth happened to look up and catch my eye and I couldn’t help myself; I mouthed, “Get OVER it!” complete with eyeroll. She looked like I’d slapped her with a wet fish, then the vapid, Moonbat-zombie expression slowly returned. [thought occurs: that slack-jawed amazement response to Moonbat antics just might be a contributing factor in the Moonbats’ image of conservatives as *ahem* slack-jawed dunderheads. hmm...]
The Fair was fun.
*[Little Old Lady, sub-species; Holey Sweater Gal [from the lumpy, loose-weave hand-knit ‘wearable textile art’ sweaters with matching Righteous Attitude they favor]
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