Mass-a-chew-sitz' Continuing Embarrassment
so Cahleefohrneeiah wouldn’t feeeeel so alone...
They’re on the Pimpin’ the Plan Tour:
Johnny “da Gigglo” Kerry:
Don’t let anybody tell you we Democrats don’t know what we stand for… *snork* Give this country a Democratic Congress and you will see a difference on Day One, and a fundamental change of direction for Washington...
Uhm hmmmmm.... Like?
Tell the truth;
“Integrity! Integrity!! Integrity!!!”
fire the incompetents;
[see: catch phrase, The Donald, one each]
find Osama bin Laden
WOW! Whattan idea!! Wish we’d thought of that!!!
and secure our ports and homeland;
ibid.
bring our troops home from Iraq;
Vive le Frentch!! *waves white flag*
*drapes flag over Teh-ray-zha as temporary burka*
obey the law
[see: Billary]
and protect our civil rights.
*adjusts Teh-ray-zha’s burka*
*checks Teh-ray-zha’s duck tape*
Stop subsidizing big oil...
...whose sales actually subsidize Bog Government; but that’s not important, now…
and start investing in energy alternatives;
see: State of the Union Speech—of Bush’s
make access to affordable health care a right and not a privilege;
FREE!!! FREEEEE!!!!! LOTSA FREE STUFF—just step inside the tent, boy…
reduce the deficit
by raising the spending [yanno—just like Bush] and your taxes!!!!
and *drumroll* respect work over wealth
*wipes excess irony off sleeve*
...trying over accomplishment, feeeelings over facts, sizzle over substance, and the Communist Manifesto over The US Constitution.
chase the money changers from the temple of democracy;
Dhimmocrats: the Jesus of Democracy *ptui*
and invest in education
whaaaaaa??? more?!?! ...and it’s working so well.
and fight for American jobs that restore the American dream.
No, not that old outdated “American Dream” where everyone has the opportunity to work hard and achieve, raise a family in peace, speak freely, and accept the consequences of their choices. Naaaaaaah—this is our NewAndImproved Amerikkan Dreeem where a few get the opportunity to work hard to pay for FREEEEE STUFF! for the rest of us, have kids that The State will raise [better’n you would], think what we tell you to, shut the hell up [unless you’re whining about your victimitude], and bendoverandbutterup for the Islamofascists.
Won’t Life be Grand!
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